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How to handle difficult bridesmaids

How to handle difficult bridesmaids

The happiness of any bride in the lead-up to her big day can sometimes rest solely with those she has asked to stand by her side for the most important day of her life. We share some tips on how to prevent bridesmaids becoming a burden, before it is too late.


1. Choose wisely

While this sage advice may be too late for some, bridesmaid selection is crucial to your overall happiness and level of drama in the lead-up to and during your big day. Choosing someone due to a misguided sense of responsibility (just because you were their bridesmaid several years back or because you promised your cousin Chloe when you were six) is a recipe for disaster. Think about the friends in your life that have celebrated with you in the happy times and comforted you while you sobbed in the sad, and if you can fast-forward ten years to picture these people still in your life, then they are probably a suitable choice.


2. Share the expense

While being asked to be a bridesmaid is a flattering sentiment, the seemingly endless expenses that come with this title can be too much for some. As a bride, be aware that everyone has different budgets and be realistic about what you expect your bridal party to fork out for. If you have found the perfect bridesmaid dresses, but your Matron of Honour may need to take out a small mortgage to don it on the day, perhaps you could offer to pay half, or consider some less expensive alternatives.

Alternatively, if you have a bridesmaid who haggles over every single price tag, you may need to have an honest heart-to-heart with her about her ability (and even willingness) to be a part of your bridal party, as sometimes this nit-picking can be a sign of bigger resentment issues unrelated to the price of her wedding heels.


3. Don't give in to diva demands

Although many brides get a bad rap in regard to Bridezilla-like tendencies in the lead up to their wedding, sometimes bridesmaids can be equally (if not more) demanding about their likes and dislikes, needs and wants. While it is important as a bride to be realistic and respectful about the expectations you have for your bridesmaids, it's also necessary to remember that this is YOUR special day. Your bridesmaids do not in fact get final say on colour choice, wedding date, venue or guest list and if you are faced with a Bridesmaidzilla who is making it all about her, then it's time to respectfully remind her that as the Bride, ultimately the decisions rest with you. If she doesn't like it, it's never too late to call cousin Chloe.


4. Communicate and appreciate

The key to all harmonious relationships is clear and honest communication. Bridesmaids are no different. Be clear from the beginning of your expectations of them in this role and speak to them openly and honestly if you sense there are problems at any stage to stop things from snowballing. Express your gratitude to them for the time, energy and expense they are committing to help make your wedding day the happiest of your life and treat them with the respect they deserve. After all, you might be asked to return the favour one day!

A perfect day

Now that your bridesmaids are sorted, be sure the rest of your big day is perfect by visiting:

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